Support Network for Victims of Narcissistic Abuse

Have you been the subject of this type of abuse?

Support for men and women who have experienced (or for those of you who are still experiencing) Narcissistic Abuse.

Hi I’m Stephanie Allen and I have a great deal of compassion for anyone who has (or indeed still is) experiencing Narcissistic Abuse after being through this process of crazy-making myself.

Now as a qualified Counsellor and Life Coach I am able to recognise almost immediately when working with a person, if they themselves, are indeed a victim of Narcissistic Abuse.

Just like heroin is to a heroin addict, the Narcissists addiction, is to totally destroy your very soul.

After a prolonged period of abuse, you may feel (the person you once were) has now been totally erased. You are left feeling like a shadow of your former self, have feelings of worthlessness, helplessness, and maybe doubting your own sanity, and be left feeling suicidal. On top of this, many victims of Narcistic Abuse may also display symptoms of Complex PTSD.

If you are in a romantic relationship with a Narcissist you may have noticed your partner behaving in the following ways.

  • Your partner is “always” right, and you are “always” wrong.
  • Your partner has an uncontrollable rage that goes from 0-100 in seconds
  • When speaking, your partner may talk over you constantly. Nothing you have to say is relevant or important (it is all about him/her)
  • Your partner talks “at” you, not to you.
  • Your partner is a different person around other people. Everyone else thinks he/she is a charming and charismatic character.
  • Character Assassination – he/she makes up terrible stories about you, to turn people against you in order to isolate you even further.
  • Flying monkeys – Your abuser may portray you as a horrible person (making up bad stories about you) in order to have others behaving aggressively towards you, to further villainise and victimise you.
  • Gaslighting – he/she will move things around, and tell you it was you. Or may have conversations with you, telling you about things you have said and done (you know you haven’t). However, over a long period of time, you eventually begin to question your sanity.
  • Your partner orchestrates events (in front of others) in which he/she is the perpetrator, and yet will sit back (after triggering you to react) and pretend to be the victim.
  • Your partner will also use fear and guilt in order to control and emotionally manipulate you in many ways.
  • At the beginning of your relationship, your partner may have love-bombed you. He/she would stop at nothing in order to get you into his/her life. Yet now you are together, your partner constantly puts you down, belittles you, devalues you, and seams to seek pleasure in humiliating you at any given opportunity.

People with NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) use mind games and language specifically designed to get their victims to behave in the following ways.

  • You may find yourself questioning your sanity
  • Through your partner, you may mistrust those who support you i.e., family, parents
  • Feel worthless
  • Give yourself no credit for any of your hard work
  • Doubt your ability to think or make decisions
  • Disconnect from your own wants and needs
  • Give in to whatever the narcissist wants
  • Devalue your own contributions
  • Obsess over your faults or mistakes
  • Ignore or make excuses for narcissist’s actions
  • Try relentlessly to gain the narcissist’s favour
  • Obsess over how to make the narcissist happy

 

Unfortunately, based on my experience through counselling in private practice, it appears as many counsellors (are very sadly) still unable to recognise this form of abuse.

Which has indeed, (indirectly) also had a catastrophic impact on my clients who have accessed counselling previously, and not felt seen, heard, or understood.

This has led on to further traumatise clients, and by the time they come to see me, they are at the lowest point in life, often feeling suicidal.

Events

Having felt very alone previously (as a former victim of Narcissistic Abuse) with absolutely no one, who understood my experience, or what was going on for me I have decided to hold an event once a month in the Caerphilly area (South Wales).

My hope is that people can meet up, reach out and connect with others, to form and maintain meaningful friendships, with individuals who are finally able to understand each other’s individual experience.

If this is of interest to you, please email me for details of where & when the next upcoming event will be held.

Facebook Support Group

I have also decided to set up a Facebook Support Network Group, in order to hopefully help many people who have suffered this experience. This will be a safe place where people can both help, encourage and support one another through their journey.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/493101977888761/

For those of you who wish to access counselling regarding your abuse, please use the contact me section.

Blogs

You can read my blog about the topic of narcissistic abuse below. 

I’m doing all my blogs as videos first now, so follow my YouTube channel to get notified of new videos as they are posted. 

An exercise to uncover if your relationship is emotionally harmful and toxic for your wellbeing

I often find when working with people that are in toxic relationships, the main question many people ask me is “Is it me” (am I the toxic one) or is it my partner?  So, if you're asking yourself this question, you're already starting in a very good place. So; we will...

Why Do People Pleasers End Up In Toxic Relationships?

Do these examples sound a lot like you? Are you forever doing things for others, so much so, that sometimes you can’t even get the things you need to get done at home or at work?  At work, are you the go to person? Do you often find you are doing the job of two or...

PTSD & C-PTSD Symptoms in Victims of Narcissistic Abuse

If you have been in a toxic relationship with a Narcissist, then here are some things you may need to know. PTSD and CPTSD can be the Aftermath of Narcissistic Abuse. These acronyms stand for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder....

The Narcissistic Supply

This blog post is about healing your life, by healing your mind. A journey of self-discovery and recovery from narcissistic abuse. I am going to explain what narcissistic supply is, and give you some examples of what some Narcissists set out to do, in order to get it....

The Mind Games The Narcissist Plays With You

So today I thought I would show you some of the games Narcissists play in order to control, manipulate, confuse and overwhelm you. After the initial shock of realising, I was a victim of narcissistic abuse myself – I began to do a lot of research and discovered that...

Are you a Victim of Narcissistic Abuse?

If you have found yourself questioning your own sanity, and find yourself wondering which one of you is the toxic, or crazy one within your relationship, this may be an indication that you are the victim of Narcissistic Abuse. Working as a Counsellor I often have...

Contact Me

Ask a question or book an appointment below.

07990 549 566

2 Ystrad Buildings, Trethomas, Caerphilly, CF83 8BT

steph@time2reflect.wales